,so this should have been posted a while back but some how just got saved in stead so the blog below is the real latest one.well sence I don't get here very often I think I will never have much people reading lol anyway lots of life happing some wonderful some not so great I posted on facebook that even though my heart breaks for those things and people who are not within my control I relish in the fact that GOD IS AND LOVES US AND GOOD BAD HE IS THERE.Today is Monday had a great time with my BFF AND hubbys at the taste of redding and Iam here to tell you redding tastes pretty darn good lol for sure got our $40. dollers worth got some sun fun and good drinks and eats and to top of the day came home and had a bomb BBQ and games with great people ,the older I get the more I realize thats what its all about people you love who love you family friends ext.. I was tired but after tucking in hubby to bed went up in time to rock my youngest grandson to sleep WHAT AN AWSOME feeling to have that sweet wonderful baby in my arms and to rock and kiss his head and to injoy and play games with my lovely grandaughters Iam am so blessed.I can't help be sad and scared over other things happing around me and am a little needy but still blessed .Been watching some of the new line up for t.v. and I can't tell you how sad it is so much about the bad side of life lets give each other someting to live up too not down to.So excited my sister and family and brother are coming this week can't wait.The fair starts this week not really exited about it to much.THINKING OF MY DADDY as we come in to fathers day he is always with me but I miss seeing him touching him hearing him ILOVE YOU DAD HAPPY FATHERS DAY you are so much a part of who I am THANKYOU and I miss you .

well I really feel for anyone who has been trying to follow my posts as there have not been any,in the past writing things down was a good couping  mechanism but as of late its been to hard to write down my thoughts of the days as just living them has taken all my energy and trying to rehash them on paper is just to exhausting but I need to say GOD is good and has gotten me through so much and helped me to let go and let him all the heart ache over Matts lack of life just reliving the drug scene is so sad and breaks my heart but I had him for a min. and now Gods turn again my heart mind and soul has been wounded by my daughters chooses but she is trying now to change that and I ask God daily to help her in that to protect and keep my grandson and keep me in his life,I have watched with amazement my brothers battle with cancer and how he keeps on keeping on I love him so,and my two nieces marriages and my son Paul's surprise marriage,new grandson on the way so many ups and downs in this thing we call life but all in all MY LIFE IS BLESSED and I have no right to bitch or feel sorry for myself I pray God continues to give me peace and I learn to facilitate and not enable .right now Iam in Washington visiting my third son mike and his sweetheart Brenda its a much needed time away with my sweet ever loving husband.I have learned its not the destination but the journey that counts and we have to see and hold on to the good friends love family ext... when it happens and let God and go of the hard bad times,God never said it would be easy only worth it and that's why Jesus died for our sins so we don't have to THANK YOU THANK YOU for this knowledge.